Citizens of Europe - time is of the essence!

I read this, apparently a direct address by Emmanuel Macron to the Citizens of Europe. Of course, it is a parody. But who really wrote it?

It gets off to a good start: "Never since the second world war has Europe been so essential." I suppose Europe was pretty essential during the Second World War, as otherwise it would have been a much smaller Japanese-American conflict with no Nazis in it, and it would have featured in far fewer subsequent films and internet discussions. However, I feel that that sentence should have started, "With the exception of Euro 96," for full banter-points.

"How would we resist the crises of financial capitalism without the euro, which is a force for the entire EU?", the author asks. Is the author Greek, perhaps? I'm ruling out German.

"Nationalists are misguided when they claim to defend our identity by withdrawing from the EU, because it is European civilisation that unites, frees and protects us." Whoever wrote it certainly knew their Gandhi.

Then we get to this: "I propose the creation of a European Agency for the Protection of Democracies to provide each EU member state with European experts to protect their election process against cyber-attacks and manipulation. ... We should have European rules banishing incitement to hatred and violence from the internet ...". A European Agency for the Protection of Democracies - that's the spirit! This "Macron" character is a less snappy version of Titania McGrath, with nods to Orwell. That suggests a British hand in the writing.

"Europe in its entirety is a vanguard: it has always defined the standards of progress. In this, it needs to drive forward a project of convergence rather than competition: Europe, where social security was created, needs to introduce a social shield for all workers, guaranteeing the same pay for the same work, and an EU minimum wage, appropriate to each country, negotiated collectively every year." That sounds like the sort of laboured (geddit?) joke that might be delivered by someone impersonating a "European" in the lighthearted final presentation of an American economics conference, i.e. not laugh-out-loud funny but it gets some points for trying. The "negotiated collectively", however, is a distinctly European grace note. The bit about Europe defining the standards of progress is hard to place: if I knew what it meant, I'd be better able to guess who wrote it.

"European humanism demands action. ... So by the end of the year, let’s set up, with representatives of the EU institutions and the member states, a Conference for Europe in order to propose all the changes our political project needs, which is open even to amending the EU treaties.  This conference will need to engage with citizens’ panels, and hear from academics, business and worker representatives, as well as religious and spiritual leaders." A conference with trade unions and bishops! That could even propose (drum roll please) ... amending the treaties! This truly will be a conference that goes all the way up to 11! I suspect an American forger would not think of putting academics first in the list of people who will address the Conference for Europe, so I'm tending to think it's a Brit who is behind it.

On balance, my considered conclusion is that it is a forgery written by a British pro-Leave undergraduate (not a professional) who is currently celebrating having hoaxed the Guardian into publishing it.

Bonus questions

Question (1): how many of the following quotations are in the original text by "Macron"?

(A) "The boundary is freedom in security."

(B) "Freedom is security with a fair and just boundary."

(C) "Security is freedom within boundaries."

(D) "Freedom means the eradication of the boundary."

(E) "European civilisation cannot abide delay. I therefore propose that a Commission on European Civilisation be set up immediately."

(F) "Our borders also need to guarantee fair competition."

(G) "It is imperative that the conference hear from citizens of all genders and none."

(H) "A new era demands a new Napoleon. Accordingly, I, Macron, shall gladly ride the Marengo of History to lead our peoples towards an enlightened future immune from any Waterloo!"

Question (2): does "Macron" suggest setting up (a) a European food safety force to improve food controls, (b) a European Climate Bank to finance the ecological transition or (c) a European Innovation Council with a budget on a par with the United States?